I had to start with researching other narrative styles.
First Person = I
Second Person = You (DnD/adventure games)
Limited Third Person = He/She/They, but limited view of just that character.
Omniscient Author = All seeing overlord
Unreliable Narrator = suspect assumptions
Observer Narrator = witness, not a character.
Changing the Narrator.
I pushed the cart and both the boy and I carry knapsacks. In the knapsacks are essential things in case we have to abandon the cart…..
By changing to the first person the story becomes present tense. I tried to write in the past tense but the urgency of the story became lost.
I tried to write second person, but my brain became overloaded and fizzed.
You push the cart, and both you and the boy carry knapsacks. In the knapsacks are essential things in case you have to abandon the cart…..
Again the tense has switched to the present tense. This time the reader feels directed, like a puppet.
Changing the narrator.
I reread the snippet and found that there’s a loss of control if the third person narrative is from the boy’s point of view. In the slice of story the man is clearly in ‘control’ of their actions with the boy following.
As for the choice of omniscient narrator, I find a detachment from the story, voyeuristic in its approach to the characters. Without reading the rest of the story I find it hard to deduce why. There are nudges towards some impending threat, so I presume it’s so the reader can remain outside of the story?